While hiking up a steep, rocky cliff here in Pennsylvania a couple days ago, my mind found strength (to my complete surprise). I recalled a text from my sister in law, Blair, that said "You are a very STRONG soul. I admire your free spirit. Love you!" As this message played in my head I thought of Blair and her strength. I decided then that I would mentally lean on her strength and she would be my personal beacon for that character trait. By the time I reached the top of the mountain I felt ecstatic. Maybe it was the endorphins, or maybe it was imagining strength in someone else whom I admired and then picturing that strength siphoning into me. It gave me something to focus on other than my own weaknesses.
Later that evening a similar event occurred. As J-man and I picked our way through boulder field after boulder field atop this ridge line the word patience came to mind. I immediately thought of my grandmother. Grandma K is one of the sweetest and most patient people I know and I dearly wished for some of her patience to get me through this tedious section of trail. It worked. I now had the strength of Blair and the patience of Grandma K.
The next day I again found myself picking through boulders, only this time on a narrow cliff thousands of miles above the towns below. Fear and shaking limbs brought me to my butt as I slid down the craggy rocks to ensure my survival on this trek. After a breakdown and some slowing of my rapid thoughts I continued on after J-man through the larger than life rocks. A memory came to me this time in my moment of need. I recalled racing bicycles at night with my brother Joel and the feeling of adventure that he embodies so well filled that memory. I imagined Joel hopping from rock to rock as I was currently doing and what his mentality might be. He would probably be laughing and pushing himself forward to the next challenging step. I leaned on this image.
Assigning a positive quality with a person I know and love gives personality and experience to these otherwise faceless words (strength, patience, adventure). These are all things I'd hope to emulate myself, but feeling like an empty vessel I need to borrow from others in the mean time. Along with those 3 traits, I've also found perseverance in my father, love in my mother, confidence in my sister Shaile, independence in my brother David and his wife Courtney, and growth through pain in my brother Nick. I love and miss my family so much along this trail, but now as I lean on them each mentally, I can send them love with my thoughts as they help me along the Appalachian Trail.
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